


Waiting

by Lavenderdripp



Series: Waiting On You [1]
Category: Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers (Marvel Movies), The Avengers (Marvel) - All Media Types
Genre: Angst with a Happy Ending, Avengers: Endgame (Movie), Avengers: Endgame (Movie) Spoilers, Character Death Fix, De-Aged Tony Stark, Domestic Fluff, Explicit Language, Explicit Sexual Content, Extremis Tony Stark, Fix-It, Hurt Tony Stark, In a way, M/M, Makeup, Marvel Universe, Not Canon Compliant, Parent Tony Stark, Past Pepper Potts/Tony Stark, Post-Avengers: Endgame (Movie), Protective Pepper Potts, Protectiveness, Slow Burn, Some Humor, Steve Feels, Tony Feels, Tony Stark Has A Heart, Tony Stark Needs a Hug, Tony gains some powers from the stones, Unresolved Sexual Tension, Unresolved Tension
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-05-05
Updated: 2019-09-08
Packaged: 2020-02-26 11:18:05
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 6
Words: 7,252
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18715972
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Lavenderdripp/pseuds/Lavenderdripp
Summary: At the end, Tony was sure he was ready to rest.But, that  didn't turn out as it should and now Tony will have to figure out how to build his life back together with the people he used to care about (still absolutely cares about)and the people he loves for than anything.





	1. 1. Tony

**Author's Note:**

> This is my first ever Steve Rogers and Tony Stark fiction and as much as I was excited, still excited, showing others this story, I am not so anxious! I ship the fuck out of them but I am super angry at Steve (and the movie) for not making a proper apology that our man deserved. 
> 
> So, heads up! I'm am going to be pretty damn harsh on the guy because, why the hell not???? He deserves a little harshness 😤. but of cause, eventually, all will be well and everyone will end up being a big happy family!
> 
> Short chapters (between, 500-1,500 words)with possible faster updates!
> 
> NOTE: I LOVE Pepper and Tony's relationship and I love their daughter even more. Don't think I am in no way belittling there development or relationship with one another. It will of course be Pepper and Tony together at the beginning, but that will not last long. I don't attend for it to be messy at all nor do I attend to not have Pepper as one of the main character in this story 🤷🏾♀️
> 
> PLEASE READ ENDNOTES!!!

Waiting

  
  
  
  


Tony could feel the immense power surging through his veins, as soon as every stone was in place along the knuckles of his suit. He could feel the overwhelming energy that all five stones had, wrapping around him like a cocoon, seeking deep into his bones, his veins, his entire being. He felt it reach his heart and he swore he wanted to scream from it  _ all _ .

 

Then, he snapped his fingers and watched Thanos' army fade away like dust. Watched ever single enemy drop like flies. Then he watched as Thanos fades away himself and felt like he was able to breath. He stood on the battlefield, tired and in so much pain.

 

Huh, so that's is what Bruce felt like? 

 

He could feel the adrenaline fall away only to be choked by the pain. He felt pain wrap itself along his bones and he wanted to weep. He wanted to weep from the joy and weep from joy. 

 

It was over. The war that has been raging on for the past six years is  _ over _ .

 

Tony was ready to  _ rest. _ He just wanted to lay down and rest. 

 

He stumbled, heavily leaning against something only to slide rope against it and land on his ass.

 

He's unable to get back up.

 

His eyes drift across the field only to see destruction everywhere. These was not a place that insight where Tony couldn't see any destruction.

 

Thay made the pain intensify anymore.

 

Had anybody lost their life just now?

 

God, did Tony lose anybody else that has already violently slipped from his fingers?

 

His question was answered in a way when Rhodes dropped down across from him alone side Peter.

 

_ Peter _ .

 

The son that Tony never had. The boy that Tony held in his arms and lost years ago. The boy that he hugged tightly against his chest and just basked in the feeling to be  _ close  _ to him again.

 

_ God, _ he was going to miss Peter so much. 

 

Peter dropped down beside him, eyes bloodshot and already shining with tears. He could here Peter talking. He could hear Peter say that they won, that they were done. He could see Peter's desperate but broken expression and just wished he could at least tell the kid how much he cares for him. 

 

He sees Rhodes come into view, a frown plastered on his face, but his eyes warm and for some reason, Tony  _ knew  _ Rhodes understood. He usually did. Even if Tony was being absolutely ridiculous, which is What Rhodes would always say when Tony was acting up. Rhodes was always there for him, even during his worst moments. It would he insane if Rhodes  _ didn't  _ understand.

 

Tony was going to miss Rhodes like crazy.

 

A pale slender hand grabbed onto Peter's shoulder, gently urging backwards and came Pepper's beautiful face popping up into view.

 

_ Oh. _

 

Oh. His beautiful wife. The women he married four years ago. The women he birthed his beautiful baby girl. His other half. God, and that heartbroken smile Pepper gave him. Those pretty eyes he loved gazing in holding his own. Strong fingers brush against his cheek and drag down along his shoulder only to grip his hand. He felt numb. Even looking into his wife's sad eyes. He felt tired and weak, even with the power of the stones breaking down his own body.

 

He was dying.

 

He was going to fade away into nothing and his kind was going to be blank. 

 

_ He _ was going to be  _ nothing _ and was not sure how he felt about it.

 

He eyes was blurring the face in front of him, he felt his sight dim even as he heard Pepper speak.

 

"You did good, Tony. You can finally rest."

 

And God did he want to.

 

He was ready to.

 

At least he thinks he was ready.

 

He feels peppers press against his cheek, he could feel the tremble she was trying to ride in, trying to hold onto for Tony.

 

His eyes drift to the side, head rolling to the side and his brown eyes meet shining blue ones.

 

Steve is frozen in place,  shield weakly held at his side as he stares at Tony's crumbled body.

His eyes are wide and his mouth his handling slightly open.

 

Their eyes meet and Tony feels his very weakened heart stutters as he witnesses the first set of silent tears drip along his dirty face.

 

_ Steve. _

 

The man who walked away when he needed him the most. 

 

The man that looked him in the eye and still had the nerve to lie to him.

 

The man who broke him in ways he never thought was no longer possible.

 

The man that he gave a piece of his mind to only to be answered with an expression numbness and understanding. Then to collapse from exhaustion.

 

The man that he ran away from. The man that he spoke about to Pepper, telling her the full truth of the numb feeling he sometimes still has because of him, only him. 

 

Pepper understood. Why? How could she understand and still say yes when he proposed weeks later? Why…

 

The man that  _ still _ had the fucking nerve to  ask for his help. To ask him to jump right back in the war when he was  _ fine _ . He was perfectly Fine with his wife and his little girl, living out in the middle of nowhere, living peacefully and quietly with the two people he loved dearly.

 

The man that somehow got into his mind, stayed on his mind and  _ convinced _ him after he tried so fucking hard to kick him out and forget about him. 

 

The man that he still so strongly cared about with his whole goddamn being even now as he is dying.

 

The man that had looked him straight in the eye and answered "Yes" when Tony asked him if he trusted him. There was no hesitation, no doubt, no guilt resting in his eyes then. There was nothing that Tony would have questioned because he wholeheartedly believes Steve.

 

Steve was open and genuine. 

 

There was no trying to dodge the answer. No way trying to ease the loaded question with something massively fake. It was just simple. 

 

It was simple and it meant so much to him just to hear that one word coming from the man he looked up to and hated as a kid and as an adult.

 

It meant  _ everything  _ to him.

 

And looking, at him now, even when Tony's heart slowed, and the light from his suit faded to nothing, he still held Steve's gaze. He still watched as Steve stood frozen with too bright eyes, wet dirty cheeks, and a weak hold onto the shield that broke him.

 

Tony wished he could speak the people surrounded him with love and grief. 

 

Tony wished he could open his mouth and tell them that he loved them.

 

Wished he could tell Steve that he. . . that he- 

 

Then there was nothing at all.

 

 

.

  
  


 

.

  
  


 

.

  
  


 

Or so he thought.

 


	2. 2. Steve

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> They have a funeral for him until they don't. . .

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I would like to thank everyone that decided to give this story a chance. I know you all just love longer chapters, which there will more than like be in the future, but still decided to check this out either way. The kudos and comments (feedback) was very sweet.
> 
> WARNING: this chapter was not double checked for spelling and I literally just finished the last five hundred words in the last 15 minutes, so bear with me.
> 
> Enjoy your reading!

  


  


  


  


They kept his casket open for everyone who was close to Tony to say their goodbyes to Tony Stark, the man who saved the universe.

  


Steve felt out of place, standing at the very end of the line with Bucky standing beside him. 

  


He watched Clint step up and kneel beside Tony's cold body and close his eyes. He notices the clench in his jaw his hands held in fist as he lays his brow along his hands. He doesn't stay for long. Just a few seconds of clenched jaw and fist before he stood up again and walked away.

  


He watched Bruce stare down at the body that had sacrificed everything to save this world. He watched him suck in some air and blowing out slowly, as if that were to enough to ease the tension in his shoulder, his arms, his whole entire body.

  


He watched Wanda sit down and stare at the body that she once blamed the death of her parents and her own brother. He watched her bite her lip to stop the trembling. He watched as she let her head drop in some sort of guilt for all that she was involved in, for not having a chance to apologize or even speak to the man ever again.

  


He watched Thor stand tall and look down at the body with a look of pride and horror zooming across his face. He wondered what the Lightning God was thinking. He wondered if he blamed himself just as much as Steve did.

  


He then watched Pepper and their little girl Morgan step up to the casket. The little girl is clinging to her mother like a lifeline. Her her cheeks were smudged with dried up tears and her eyes were red from crying. Pepper seems to be more in control of her grief. Although her eyes are red, but she has a soft little smile on her lips. She held her child and whispered something in her ear, which the little girl shook her head. 

  


When pepper sat her down, he notices something in her hand. When she leaned forward and placed the object on top of her daddy's chest, Steve felt like crying all over again.

  


There sat the arc reactor, dull and dark and completely dead. Steve felt numb staring at the scene.

  


His little girl, who was now going to have to grow up without her father, bent down and patted Tony's lifeless body, her tiny hand touching around his heart and she from where Steve is sitting, he is quite sure she tells him that he loves her. 

  


Things seemed to move fast at that and Steve's nerves begin to rise as he realizes that he was getting closer. He was getting close to the corpse that is Tony Stark, billionaire and hero. 

  


Tony Stark, the guy that had saved all their life with the courage of just a snap of his fingers.

  


He doesn't realize that he was right in front of the body until he was looking down at Tony's lifeless body.

  


He looks at the gray hair growing in the black, making his hair look like a mix of salt and pepper. He looks at the burnt part of his face and couldn't help but flinch. He sees how the tan on his body is no longer painted his body, how Tony's body was as pale as….

  


Steve, bit his lip and clenched his fist together, having to close his eyes for a second. Had to regain some control.

  


What right does he have to cry?

  


What right does he have to stand there at Tony's funeral and be considered a friend?

  


It felt like it was all business at first. Felt like fighting to end the quietness and loneliness in everyone's heart was business while working with Tony again.

  


Until the end. Until the end when he was able to look at Tony right in the eye and be completely honest.

  


When he told Tony that he trusted him. Looking the man straight in the eye and saying that one word that was that had so much meaning to it.

  


He regretted.

  


He  _ regretted  _ so much of the past 6 years with his entire being.

  


He regrets using Tony's resources without exactly telling him what he was looking for.

  


He regretted  it having the guts to tell Tony the truth of his parents as soon as he found out. Hated that he kept his mouth quiet until he couldn't anymore.

  


He regretted  _ still _ lying to the man when Tony demanded answers.

  


He regretted fighting Tony through his grief. Through his pain, and through his rage for finding out that he best friend had killed his parents, killed his mom.

  


Gosh, he regretted so much.

  


He so much he wished he did differently.

  


Wish that things could have been different.

  


Wish that he had the fucking nerve to at least say goodbye when he was dying right in front of everyone l. Wish he wasn't petrified of the fact that Tony,  _ Tony _ , the guy that always had a snarky and sarcastic answer up his sleeve, was dying in front of him.

  


And he never. . . He never was able to-

  


"He has a heartbeat."

  


Steve whipped his head towards Wanda, whose eyes were wide and huge as he magic sparked just a little bit as she stared down at the body that was Tony.

  


"What?" 

  


His voice was hoarse and it cracked when he spoke.

  


He looked down at Tony and his heart beat began to beat drastically as he watched with awe and fascination at Tony.

  


To witness something that was a miracle such as, watch the burnt marks along his arm and the half of his face fade away, astonishing.

  


Steve could hear commotion around him but his eyes were glued to Tony.

  


He could hear Wanda speaking but could not understand why she was saying. All of his focus was on the man that was drastically gain his color back in a blink of an eye.

  


Wrinkles of old age even began to fade, hair was a lot darker than Steve could ever remember and oh my goodness, has Tony always had such shiny hair like this?

  


Steve could not even explain how he was feeling right now. He did not even know if he should be terrified or happy at seeing the man they just lost in battle not even forty-eight hours ago gain features he had when he was alive.

  


But, God it was Tony. Tony was alive!

  


From where Steve stood, motionless and mesmerized at the transformation of Tony, he could feel magic buzzing in the air. Could feel his wrap around the casket, wrap around Tony like a blanket of comfort.

  


But it was intense.

  


Steve felt like he could drop on his knees just feeling it in waves surrounding him like it was unable to control itself, unable to reign in the intensity of it all.

  


He could distinctly here Wanda say " _ Holy shit." _ before the intensity died down, reeled in to the body of Tony Stark and settle.

  


He then hears gasp surround him as Tony opens his eyes, a gasp leaving his mouth as if he was drowning in something just recently and all he could focus on was the bright color of purple before was dulled down to his brown ones.

  


If there was shocked silence around them and all Tony is doing and blinking back to existence.

  


"What the fuck." Is the first words uttered from his mouth.

  


Pepper burst into tears.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Any comments are always welcome!!!
> 
> Again, thanks for tuning in!
> 
> Your friendly black gal,  
> Ali 💜


	3. 3. Tony

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "The next few days was a clustered up mess for Tony and the people surrounding him."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Me:*promises to update regularly*  
> Also Me: *doesn't update fro two weeks*  
> Y'all: And I Oop-...
> 
> Seriously, sorry! I had so much going on for the last several days. Work and my other two stories I have up. And of course, just life.
> 
> ALSO, I see that a lot of you are wanting to see Natasha come back and I am NOW planning on making that happen 😊.
> 
> ALSO, updates won't be regularly done like I originally wanted then to be. But I will try to have at least two-hour chapters out every month!
> 
> Please enjoy.

 

 

 

 

 

 

The next few days was a clustered up mess for Tony and the people surrounding him.

 

People that were have not went home from the battle rampaged towards him with questions he had no answer for.  

 

They asked how was he alive. 

 

"I don't know."

 

They asked why does he suddenly look so younger, more vibrant?

 

"I have no idea."

 

They asked if he remembered anything while being. . . Gone.

 

"I. . . I don't think so. I can't remember."

 

They asked him if he was happy being back. Asked if he was happy that he was alive.

 

He didn't know how to answer that. So, he dodged the answer as best as he could.

 

They asked if he felt any different.

 

"Yes. I feel . . . Alive. I feel. . . Different."

 

So many questions were being thrown at him. So many questions that Tony had no actual answer for, but to say that he was alive when he was more than likely suppose to he dead.

 

_ What the hell happened? _

 

Tony had no clue. A lot of people didn't know.

 

He had caught Wanda looking st him with a weird stare on her face at least five time for the past three days and he was sure she could possibly know what was going on. Maybe Strange would have more answers too.

 

I mean, he did see this coming. . .

 

Pepper hasn't left his side not once for the past few days of him waking up in his own coffin. She has herself plastered along her hip wherever he goes. 

 

Megan doesn't seem to understand still. I mean, hell. Tony doesn't even understand. At first he was dead and now he's not. But that doesn't stop his daughter from jumping into his arms whenever they're alone together, burying her face into his neck and sniffling.

 

Tony heart breaks a little and always holds her tight.

 

Cleaning up the battle is taking a lot longer than anyone would have anticipated. Probably because it's only been a handful of days and all people are really worried are getting back to families, and resting. 

 

_ Oh God, resting _ .

 

Tony hasn't been able to get any shut eye ever since waking up from his permanent nap.  Every he lays down, next to Pepper who would wrap around him, being as close as possible, he body felt like it was buzzing. Felt like he was on a constant move, even if he was perfectly still or relaxed. He didn't understand it.

 

And he  _ hated  _ not understanding. 

 

He felt overwhelmed with the simple fact of him even being alive.

 

He remembers the battle. He remembers the feeling of his body giving up on him after using the stones. He remembers Peter's stricken face and Peppers gentle and sad smile. He remembers Rhodes frown glued on his lips as he looked down at his best friend, who was dying right in front of him.

 

He remembers Steve.

 

_ Oh. Steve.  _

 

Steve who came back to his house in the middle of nowhere, only to distance himself from all the others that have came to visit and stay for awhile.

 

> The last time he saw Steve was a few days ago, when Steve and a handful of others, such as Bruce and Wanda, all simply wanting to be surrounded with the fact that Tony  was okay. That he was alive.

 

None of them have asked questions yet. All just gave him little gestures of greetings and such and moved around the house as if they were walking on glass, unsure of what to do, what to feel.

 

Steve hasn't spoken a word to him since waking up. Hasn't really been around when Tony would roam around the house with Megan or Pepper close by. He was always. . . About.

 

And that irritated him more than he would like.

 

So now Tony finds himself walking along his own backyard  where the lake surrounding the area lays, in the middle of the night.

 

He sees Steve sitting on a bench in the short distance where he was at, head tilted back and eyes more than likely looking into the sky.

 

Tony draws closer but still doesnt make himself to be heard or seen, silently making his way towards the man.

 

"You know, you're not as quiet as you would like to be."

 

Steve's voice travels softly from the short distance, just a few feet away from where he is sitting, looking up at the sky.

 

Tony still doesn't speak up until he has crossed the space between them and sits on the opposite end of the bench.

 

Neither look at each other.

 

Both just simply sit silently, taking in one another's presence with ease and weirdly comforted.

 

"How have you been holding up."

 

It was Steve that breaks the silent first. 

 

"I have been better, but. . . I'm good."

 

Neither turn towards each other, but speak clearly.

 

Steve hums at Tony's simple answer, seemingly not at all surprised by the response.

 

"What about you?"

 

This time Tony speaks up.

 

This should be awkward. There should be tension and anger and anything other than small talk going on right now.

 

"I'm not okay."

 

This answer throws Tony off guard for some reason and he turns towards the man.

 

Steve is now looking forward into the night, looking out onto the lake. Those usually bright blue eyes were dull.

 

Blank even.

 

The last time Tony saw that look was when he had ripped him a new one after being rescued from space. It was the same, stoic, neutral, but  _ dead  _ look.

 

It made him feel uneasy.

 

"You know I thought about staying back when turning in the gauntlet." 

 

Tony blinked at the change of tone, as Steve let our a breath of air, tone light and soft.

 

"I thought about running to Peggy so I could stay with her. Hug her,kiss her, and finally have that dance we both wanted before I went into the ice."

 

"At the end, after turning in the damn cursed thing, i did see Peggy. But… I couldn't stay."

 

Steve let out a broken laugh, sounding wet and emotional, but his face was still void of any emotion. Him talking wasn't doing him any good.

 

"I  _ couldn't stay  _ while knowing that the future, this present was still in shambles and that I still haven't. . . I haven't apologized to the people I hurt the most."

 

Tony felt the tension building inside of him after Steve finished his last sentence. Felt his heartbeat increase as his internally shivered from what may come.

 

" _ Steve,  _ **_don't._ ** _ " _

 

Steve turned then, eyes locking onto Tony's and his face crumbled. 

 

Agony and anguish and so many other emotions flashed for Steve's face like lightning. His mouth was set into a harsh frown Nd his brows were scrunched up, eyes telling a whole nother Story Tony wasn't ready to listen to.

 

"Tony, I can't just leave things like they are-"

 

"You are  _ five _ fucjing years too late, asshole."  Tony hissed with the anger bursting through, his breath whooshing out of him before he could register his own words.

 

He should stop, he should stop talking and let the man talk. Let him explain himself. 

 

But his blood was boiling and his anger was making him spew what right then, laying it all out there for all to know.

 

For  _ Steve  _ to know.

 

"You are five years too late and I don't want to hear it. Not now not ever. You could have apoligzed as soon as we reunited. You could have fucking apologized when I woke up from the hospital after having my episode in front of everyone. But you fucking _sat_ there. You sat there and didn't say a word. Didn't say a word about it for _years_. You turned you Goddamn back on me _again_ even after we saw each other again."

 

"Tony-"

 

"You fucking turned you back on me again after we reunited! All of you did. You.all acted like what happened before the fucking war never happened. Went on about it but I had to fucking sit in the mess.  **I** had fix the shit you all caused."

 

"Tony-."

 

"Do.you know what's the worst part about it is?"

 

There was silence. Just Steve looking at him, pleading with him with the stupid fucking eyes and Tony felt like he couldn't breathe again.

 

"The worst fucking part is it was so fucking easy to forgive when you asked for  _ me _ to help you all. It was easy to forgive you guys then."

 

"And I fucking hate the effect you all have on me."

 

_ Hate the effect  _ **_you_ ** _ have on me. _

 

Tony felt his emotions come.through, notices his vision blurring and felt the tears slide down his face while he spoke.

 

he gripped the part of the bench, trying to steady his heartbeat, trying to steady his emotions.

 

His hold bent the metal as his grip tightened. The metal forming tighter on itself as his grip grew.

 

it was silent.

 

Tony was shaking from the shock and emotion and Steve was eerily silent. Not making a sound at first.

 

Then he spoke.

 

"Oh,  _ Tony _ ."

 

He couldn't take his no more.

 

He ripped himself away from the bench. Taking part of the metal bar he was gripping on with him.

 

The bench wobbled,  even with Steve's weight sitting on it as Tony stood up.

 

Tony had no other things on mind other then the fact he somehow was able to even rip the metal off.

 

He looked at Steve in the eyes, whose face was falling between shock and sadness.

 

"Just fuck you Steve."

 

The dropped the piece of metal in his hand and continued to March away from Steve, turning his back on him this time.

 

Just like he did twice already.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm, was this a little too much? Oh well, our boys are nowhere as calm. They never have been lol.
> 
> ALL COMMENTS ARE WELCOME


	4. 4. Pepper

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> " "I yelled at him for leaving me just as the others did and admitted to him that I would have forgiven them if they were to just..just-"
> 
> Tony's voice cracks again, voice hitching as he tried to to finish his sentence. But it didn't come. "

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is Pepper's P.O.V.
> 
> Let me just say: FEELINGS ARE EVERYWHERE!
> 
> As I only checked over this once this morning, all mistakes are mine. Sorry in advance 
> 
> Please ignore my endnote about Natasha. I am definitely bringing her back! Just trying to figure out how to set that up in a scene, honestly.

* * *

>  

 

 

 

Tony seemed to fall into these states of silence since he. . . Since he has come back from death.

 

Pepper has been keeping a watchful eye on him.for the past few weeks, so of course she knows she she's talking about.

 

She watches in stand beside the window, looking out at the quiet state of the surroundings and the lake laying quietly. His eyes are distance and gone from the present, brows pinched a little and a dead look of _nothing_ falls along his face when he is like this.

 

Pepper is worried. But not all surprised.

 

She has no idea what he's going through. And will be honest and admit that she has never thought to ask. She's been overwhelmed with the fact that he is _alive_ , she never thought to ask him how he was.

 

But she can tell. She can tell that he's struggling more than he would like to admit.

 

The vacant look he has in his eyes sometimes when he thinks no one is paying attention.

 

Holding onto his daughter like he's terrified of losing her once again.

 

Looking at Maximoff or Banner from afar with a twisted, pained expression on his face.

 

Hugging her tightly when they both settle down at night, only to ease his way out of bed hours later and wandering around the house.

 

She knows he has been doing this a lot, for at least every night in the past week, as she would wake up when she felt the bed shift.

 

Now, as she stands from afar and looks at the dazed, far off look in his eyes, has he break breaking more than it had when he had died.

 

And Pepper truly hated how she did not know how to comfort him.

 

Not with this.

 

Not with coming back from death itself after sacrificing yourself to save the entire world.

 

She didn't understand how it felt to die. She didn't know how it felt to drift away into nothing but a memory.

 

"I can feel your stare from way over there, love."

 

Tony's voice drifts over to where  Pepper stands. She sighs at his voice and walks over to where he is, which is standing by the window, looking out into the lake.

 

Pepper doesn't speak.

 

She doesn't even know what to say. Where to even begin.

 

"I gave Steve a piece of my mind a few days ago."

 

his voice sounds cheery, energetic.  Happy even.

 

But his facial expression, which is void of any happiness.

 

He looks so defeated.

 

"He apologized."

 

Pepper glances back at him as his voice cracks a little. The expression morphs into something torn and broken and Pepper breath hitches at the change of expression.

 

"He apologized and I quite  literally ripped the bench from under my grasp. While we were both sitting on it."

 

Pepper eyes went comically wide, her mouth dropping open at Tony's statement.

 

His strength…

 

"Tony-"

 

"I don't want to speak about that right now. Not-not yet, Peps."

 

Her mouth clicked shut and she shook her head, arms crossing over her chest she looked up at him.

 

"Is. . . Are you to better?"

 

Pepper says with hesitation.

 

Tony lets out a shaky sigh as he looks away from the window, eyes drifting to meet Pepper's before he looked down at the ground.

 

"I yelled at him for leaving me."

 

Pepper sucks in air as he admits this and she can feel the pain radiating off of him.

 

"I yelled at him for leaving me just as the others did and admitted to him that  I would have forgiven them if they were to just..just-"

 

Tony's voice cracks again, voice hitching as he tried to to finish his sentence. But it didn't come.

 

Instead Pepper hears the deep gasp falling from Tony's lips as a sob follows soon after.

 

Now, Pepper knows what to do now. Knows how to comfort him.

 

She pulls Tony to her chest, tucking his head  against her as she wraps both arms around his shoulders.

 

She hears the sobbing increase and she begins to shush him., rubbing her hand up and down his back as he breaks down against  her.

 

And her heart just breaks a little more.

 

She feels tears well up in her eyes as one of the strongest man she knows cries his eyes out. She hasn't seen this much emotion with him since the birth of Morgan. Tony doesn't show this much even on a regular day. And Pepper was used to that.

 

Now, as he sobs in her shoulder, gripping onto her tightly, almost painfully so, she realizes that Tony has barely shed a tear for the time she has known him. Only a handful of times has he downright cried or broke down in front of her, and each kne hurt more than the last.

 

"I thought I forgave them, forgave _him_ for what he's done. We-we were working so _well_ together," Tony says through the tears, grips still tight and shoulders still shaking and hunched over. " I _wanted_ to forgive him as much as I would have just years ago if he, if he had-"

 

"I know honey."

 

She says.

 

"But now? _Now?_  I feel so much anger in hurt towards what happened. I feel broken for what was intentionally ripped from me, from the team.  And I feel pain more than anything."

 

"Oh Tony."

 

Her voice cracks.

 

"Pain because after all this time. After having to die- to _fucking die_ , he wants to apologize. I don't think I can forgive him, Pepper. I don't think I'll ever be able to. Not anymore. "

 

As Tony says this into Pepper's shoulder, neither notice a shadow from just several feet away from them.

 

Neither of them notice the broken looks and silent tears as they fall from Steve Roger's face.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I absolutely appreciate any and all comments 💖.


	5. 5. Steve

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "Steve met her eyes and he shook his head, Morgan's fierce attitude and Potts open expression had him give a answer that would be a start in the correct direction."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> PLEASE READ:
> 
> it's been well over a month since I last updated this story?
> 
> Yikes!
> 
> this story should have been updated by Thursday morning but, my lazy ass didn't want to check my spelling and decided to procrastinate like crazy until now so. . .
> 
> Mega Y I K E S!
> 
> either way, thank you for all the feedback on the last chapter. It is always nice to know that people enjoy anything that I decide to post :)
> 
> BY THE WAY!!!! I don't think I will be bringing my baby mama Natasha back due to my ass running over my damn self trying to figure out where she will be in the story as a whole. I apologize and I hope this doesn't upset too many people. SHE WILL BE MENTIONED THROUGHOUT THE STORY IN MEMORIES AND MENTIONS THOUGH!
> 
> TUMBLR LINK AT THE END OF CHAPTER!

****

"Are you sure you want to go alone."

 

Sam Wilson walked along with Steve as he carried his motorcycle helmet  against his hip,

 

Steve kept his gaze ahead, trying to give off a calming expression as he shook his head yes before answering Sam's question.

 

"It's been . . . A rough month  for everyone. I think a little time running around the on my bike will make me feel better."

 

_ It won't. _

 

Tony has barely even said a word to Steve, let along look at him for more than two seconds, and it was driving Steve  up a wall. 

 

Nit that Steve has been trying himself to speak with Tony. To make things right.

 

But will it ever be right? Will it ever he okay? It doesn't know anymore.

 

He cant forget the broken look Tony had before crying into his wife's shoulder. He remembers those words like they were burned into his soul for eternity.

 

_ " I don't think I can forgive him. I don't think I'll ever be able to." _

 

Just hearing those words actually come out of Tony's mouth had him tearing up once again. Had him.feeling hallow and blank and the grief of all that had happened in the last five years just came rushing back to him.

 

They lost Natasha, and she was never coming back. No matter how badly Steve wanted her here, he knows he cannot wish of such things. Not all people are allowed to be brought back from the dead. Not al people were lucky.

 

They had a nice little funeral for her, everyone showing up and sitting there quietly staring down at an empty casket. They payed their respects silently and walked away from each other as it ended.

 

Walked away from each other…

 

Sam is look at Steve with an uncertain look in his eyes. He came to say hello to Stark and see how he was doing and that's when Steve told him.about his little runaway plan.

 

Because, that's what he does. Runs away.

 

Sam sighs long sigh, his hands in his hips as he tilts his head at Steve.

 

"You sure you're gonna be okay?"

 

Steve knows why Sam is asking. Know that he simply worried that Steve will leave and wallow in his own personal inner demons and let it consume him to the point that he'll close himself off from anybody trying to get in.

  
  


 Steve gave Sam a little something he likes to call his half-assed smile before answering.

 

"It's just gonna be for a few days. Maybe a week or so. I'm not sure yet."

 

Steve crossed his arms over his chest before turning away and looking out into the deserted road, his bike on the in the grass to be rolled out into the street.

 

"Look man . . ." Sam Starts, a sigh falling from his lips once again and Steve compared himself for a pep talk.

 

But there was there was suddenly movement running towards them like a storm, small thuds being heard from where Steve and Sam stood. There was a shout further away, possibly from Potts.

 

But the time Steve turned his head at the commotion, there was a head of brown hair flowing wildly behind Tony's little girls hair, her hands in fist as she scurried away from her mother and closer to where Steve sat.

 

"Mr. captain! Mr. Captain! You can't!"

 

Morgan ran to catch up with the two grown men, her little feet crashing to a stop before she begin to jump around a little. Her big brown eyes that reminded him of Tony's,

Looking up at him with anwide and focused gaze.

 

"You can't leave again!" Morgan says in huffs of breath, as she was still bouncing on her feet. "You're gonna make my daddy sad again!"

 

Steve felt his heart ache as he looked down at the young ball on innocence, blinking down at her with his mouth slightly open.

 

"Again?"

 

Was the only thing he could luster as the little girl bounced on her toes, her eyes trained on Steve like a Target ready to hit its mark.

 

"Yeah! Daddy told me how you guys had a bad fight and that you left him to do things on his own. If you leave again, he'll be really really sad!"

 

Steve looked at this girl and his first thought was, "Wow, she sure is energetic and insistent." Then his next thought was, "How much did Tony tell her about him? Why did Tony tell her in the first place?"

 

"Morgan!"

 

Potts voice was closer and sharper as she caught up with her daughter. Her hair down and there were circles under her blue eyes. She looked absolutely exhausted.

 

Morgan gave her mom no mind as she spoke up again, her bouncing coming to a stop but her arms crossing over her chest and under her armpits, her expression forming into a more pinched looks. Sour and sad.

 

"Daddy told me that you and the Vengers fought bad guys and that you guys were like a co-com...complicated family and that when he found out something horrible, that you guys had a really bad fight. That you left him and that no one apologized to each other. That it was because of stubbornness and pride. But he told me that he cared and still misses his other family. Did you do it then?"

 

Steve looked at her with a heavy heart.

 

"Did I do what?"

 

"Apologize."

 

Steve.flinched a little, looking at Potts, who seemed like she was gonna have a heart attack. There eyes met. And for a split second, Steve felt like crying.

 

He felt like breaking down in front of Sam and Potts and Morgan, this little girl that reminded him so  _ m _ uc _ h  _ of Tony and just weeping out of his regrets and sorrow and anger 

 

"No. No, not really."

 

Morgan tilted her head, looking up at him with that same pinched look on her face.

 

"What does that mean? No or yes?"

 

Steve, despite the honest question and oblivious bluntness to the five year olds statement, couldn't help but laugh. Let it be a little girl asking such questions when the answer is much more complicated than that.

 

"I don't know." Steve tells her.

 

it was quiet for a few seconds, Morgan sizing Steve down like he was the enemy. In a way, he was.

 

"Well. I don't like when daddies sad. You should tell daddy you're sorry before you go. Are you coming back soon?"

 

It still blew Steve away that Morgan had fully set herself to be smack dab in the middle of what was going on between Tony and Steve. Crazy how she was able to meet Steve square in the eye and without fully saying it,  that he was a complete idiot. And a coward. And stupid. 

 

He glanced back at his bike then made eye contact with Sam, whereas looking very interested in the conversation at hand, eyes all knowing and stance relaxes and casual.

 

There was hesitance when Potts begin to speak, a crack of words before she was able to form what she was trying to say. 

 

"I'm sorry about that. She's likes to talk about stuff that doesn't necessarily involve her. But… I'm cooking a meal tonight for plenty. I am tired roaming around the house not doing anything. Maybe you two could stay for awhile. Have a talk and beer?"

 

Steve met her eyes and he shook his head, Morgan's fierce attitude and Potts open expression had him give a answer that would be a start in the correct direction.

 

"Yeah," he says, his voice calm and thoughtful as he look past Potts's head, at the nice big Cabin-house with an uneasy but determined feeling. "Yeah. I think that would be great."

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

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**Notes for the Chapter:**

> HI 👋🏽


	6. 6. Tony

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Tony's bitterness came first, the thought of Steve saying he wanted to he friends again, as if Steve ever acted like a true friend in the first place. But that wasn't needed. Not right now. Not when Steve was offering a fresh start.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> All I can genuinely say is, I am so so sorry for being gone for almost two months! Trust me, that definitely wasn't my intentions at all!
> 
> Either way, this is another shirt chapter that'll still hopefully draw you guys in :)
> 
> Please enjoy

 

 

 

 

      To say that dinner was an interesting. . . But awkward event was saying something altogether.

 

Tony was surrounded by Pepper, his daughter and surprisingly Steve, Wilson and Wanda in one sitting. Pepper had cooked enough spaghetti to feed plenty of people so it wasn't necessarily a problem when it came to portion and food.

 

What was a problem is that Steve, who sat two chairs down from him, kept glancing at him with a resigned but meaningful expression. It was making him itch by how obvious he was being. How everytime he looked Steve's way and caught him looking, Steve would turn his head without so much as a flustered look or embarrassment.

 

It aggravated Tony a little. How can Steve just sit there, continue to glance and look at Tony with so much as non-existent embarrassment. 

 

It surprised Tony more than almost anything that after dinner was over, and Tony had offered to stay behind to pick up (because goddammit he was tired of overthinking his second chance at life), that Steve suggested to help him.

The way his little girl looked at him, with those big intelligent brown eyes before walking out with Pepper, stopped whatever snarky comment he was going to make.

 

So instead, here he was, washing the plates and packing up food with Steve wiping down the table, countertops and putting up dishes.

 

In a way, it was domestic and relaxing to just work by one another but not speak, somehow,  _ somehow  _ taking comfort in each others presence.

 

The kitchen was looking good when Steven took a pause in what he was doing, putting the dish rag down before turning fully towards Tony.

 

"I know we haven't been the best of teammates or friends since we first met one another but, I'm really s-"

 

" _ Don't apologize." _

 

Tony hisses before he could even finish his sentence. His shoulders  hunching up automatically, sudden annoyance coming forward and the peace almost evaporating  into nothing.

 

Steve  raised his hands, as if in surrender, his blue staring right into Tony's. Tony feels like those blue orbs are swallowing him up, like they were judg9ng his very existence.

 

Steve speaks again, his voice soft and calm as if he is speaking to a wounded animal. In a way, he probably is. He barely even feels like himself any more.

 

Ever since dying and fading into blackness… only to wake up in his own coffin with people staring at him with wide,  _ scared  _ eyes,he's  felt off. . .

 

" It's just. . . We've been through so much-  _ you've  _ been through do much and I don't wanna- I don't want this to be like this between the two of us. I want… I really want to be friends again, Tony. I would like a fresh start."

 

Tony's bitterness came first, the thought of Steve saying he wanted to he friends  _ again _ , as if Steve ever acted like a true friend in the first place. But that wasn't needed. Not right now. Not when Steve was offering a fresh start. 

 

Not when Steve was looking at him with hope in his eyes and  in his expression. Not when Stece kept his firm stare onto Tony. His stance clear, and determined.

 

Tony wanted to snort. 

 

When had Steve ever really given up? 

 

So, Tony let's out a sigh, his gaze dropping on the floor for a solid second before he meets Steve's stare.

 

He walked the few  steps to be right in front of Steve, who was hovering over him by at least four inches, always the taller on out of the bunch.

 

He holds out his hand, his eyes stay on those blue ords.

 

"Hello. My name is Anthony Stark. My friends call me Tony."

 

Steve blinks at him then down at his hands. Tony watches as Steve takes in what this means, what Tony is agreeing to before he breaks out into a huge grin.

 

Steve and Tony's wrapped around each other and shake each others hands. Tony's distinctly realizes that Steve's hand was soft and warm.

 

"Hello, Anthony. My name is Steve Rogers. I hope we can become friends."

 

Tony can't help but roll his eyes, can't help that stupid fucking grin spreading along his mouth or the stupid way his ears burn. 

 

"I guess we'll have to wait and see."

 

And Tony means it. It won't be easy for either of them, but if Steve is willing to try, Tony is not one to step back from a challenge.

 

Especially on that involves Rogers.

 

"Yes, I guess so."

 

Steve's easy grin stays on his lips.

 

Before there is anything more to add or say.

 

There is a loud knock at the door, which jolts both men away from each other.

 

Neither of them realizing that they were still holding onto each others hand before they physically have to pull away from one another.

 

Tony tries not to blush when he makes his way to his door, trying to figure out who would be making a stop past 9 o'clock at night.

 

When he opens up the door, he cant help his jaw dropping or his eyes widening.

 

Dr. strange stood their with a bored expression on his face, dressed in plain denim pants and a solid shirt.

 

He looks Tony up and down before he makes a sound of his own, in shock or surprise, Tony's not sure.

 

"Well,"  Strange says, his eyebrows lifting up before meeting Tony's eyes. "Are you going to invite me in or do I have to question you right here?"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you to everyone who left kudos and comments

**Author's Note:**

> Should I bring back Natasha? Or should she stay as she is (dead unfortunately like what the fuck Marvel)??
> 
> ANY COMMENTS ARE WELCOME.
> 
> I have a love/hate relationship with criticism but that's perfectly fine. Just give it on me! I can take it.


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